So I watched Oprah’s interview with The Duke and Duchess of Sussex and as is the Nigerian thing to do, I would be sticking my nose where it definitely does not belong. I did not want to say anything initially but the people around me had some unpleasant things to say about Meghan and I need to address that.
I like to start with the bad news so the only mistake I think Meghan made was not making considerable effort to understand just how “different” the British Royal Family is. In her defense, a majority of married women would tell you that you never truly know your husband’s family until you are properly married.
A major observation I made was that Harry and Meghan tried as much as possible not to use negative words while describing their time together as members of the royal family. I must commend them for that because Lord knows I do not think I have that much decorum. Another observation I made is that whenever Oprah asked a question that a negative answer would be provided, I noticed that Harry and Meghan would pause before answering, as if to gather the right words so as not say anything bad.
I loved how she spoke so warmly about the Queen. And I totally believe that the Queen did make her feel welcome. I want to believe that The Queen is a good person and really did try her best but there are force beyond her control sometimes. Let me add that if you have not watched “The Crown”, you have no right commenting about the royal business.
When Meghan spoke about being depressed and suicidal and not being ashamed to voice these emotions, I really felt that. She spoke about a particular photo her friend sent to her where it seems she looked radiant but that was the day she finally summoned the courage to tell her husband how she felt. It just goes to show that we should not judge people by what you see being portrayed in the media, especially women. Women do a fantastic job of covering the truth in marriage when it is unpleasant.
I say this over and over again on twitter: Choose the man who chooses you.
By Royal Family standards, everything was wrong with Meghan: Mixed race, Divorcee, actress, came from no money, older than Harry but all these did not deter him. I am sad that things panned out the way they did but like Harry pointed out, Egungun was about to enter the expressway. Meghan overcame her shame and voiced her fears to her husband but she was sure he would listen to her. He did listen to her and did all he could to help her get better, including stepping down as a senior member of the royal family.
I hope many couples can learn to be open with each other especially about their worries. To listen to the other person in a bid to understand and not just to respond. So, wait for that man. He may take a little while showing up but when he does, it will be well worth the wait.
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Halimah is a firm believer that the education and empowerment of women are essential tools for lasting peace and progress in our society and that women should be allowed to pursue whatsoever path they choose. Born and raised in Nigeria, she has been described as "outspoken,energetic and diligent". Her passion for social change has led her to volunteer at a number of organizations that are passionate about having a tangible impact on society. Halimah currently works as an Assistant lecturer at the Department of Library and Information Technology,Federal University of Technology, Minna, Nigeria. She hopes to establish a mentoring program to provide young girls and women with proper guidance to make informed choices aimed at personal fufillment. She relaxes by reading and watching movies.