A lot of people were putting finishing touches to the plans for last week Sunday. Yeah, Valentine’s Day. There was a fever in the air and almost everybody (admit it, it won’t kill you) either caught it or was very aware of it. How could we not be? Social Media made it impossible not to. It was my elder sister’s birthday so I never forget it, but that’s beside the point.
This is for the people who were made more aware of their loneliness. Those who were reminded of just how much of a wallflower they are; or have been over the years.
Especially the ones that are termed or viewed as “too attractive” to belong to this group. Year in, year out, you watch family and friends receive gifts and that extra attention that you can only dream about. And you are sucked back into that little dark hole that you have worked so hard to pull yourself out of. Questioning your self-worth. Questioning everything. Thinking thoughts you have no business thinking.
So I came up with a personal solution to this problem and I want to share it with you in hope that it would help one or twenty or a thousand people feel better moving forward. Make a list of all the things you would expect a partner to do for you on this day and do it for yourself. Every single thing.
- If you want to be told “I love you”, say that to yourself every chance you get.
- If you want to receive a special message, write a beautiful love letter to yourself and read it on valentine’s day.
- If you want flowers, buy and have them delivered to you, even if it is just a stem.
- If you to be taken to a fancy restaurant, pick one you like, book ahead and take yourself there to have a nice meal.
- If you want a particular gift, buy it for yourself.
- If you want to be taken on vacation, pick a location and make them plans for yourself baby.
If you have the means to do these, please go all out for yourself. You are the most important person in your life so you should be number one priority. If you do not have the funds, then plan to do them at a later date this year (You don’t have to do them all at once) or you can plan for 2022. If Valentine’s Day is important to you, celebrate it by all means. Don’t let anyone make you feel some type of way for wanting to feel special. You do not need anyone to make you feel special. Yes, it is a lovely feeling to be treated nicely by other people but that should be the icing on the cake. And besides, if you don’t see the special in you, nobody will.
Moving forward, whatever you decide to do, I hope you look the beyond uneventful Valentine Celebration and find ways to bask in love from everything around you.
Peace and love,
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Halimah is a firm believer that the education and empowerment of women are essential tools for lasting peace and progress in our society and that women should be allowed to pursue whatsoever path they choose. Born and raised in Nigeria, she has been described as "outspoken,energetic and diligent". Her passion for social change has led her to volunteer at a number of organizations that are passionate about having a tangible impact on society. Halimah currently works as an Assistant lecturer at the Department of Library and Information Technology,Federal University of Technology, Minna, Nigeria. She hopes to establish a mentoring program to provide young girls and women with proper guidance to make informed choices aimed at personal fufillment. She relaxes by reading and watching movies.