Nollywood actress Mary Njoku has urged people to reconsider how they offer encouragement, cautioning that even well-meaning words can have unintended emotional consequences.
Taking to Instagram, Njoku explained that telling someone they can achieve something they personally doubt may come off as pressure rather than support. She emphasized that such encouragement, while seemingly positive, can lead to feelings of inadequacy, guilt, or even depression.
The filmmaker highlighted importance of respecting people’s self-perception and understanding that not everyone sees a challenge the same way. According to her, self-belief is a major driver of success, and when someone lacks that belief, it’s important to accept their perspective without criticism.
“Sometimes, saying ‘you can do it’ to someone who believes they can’t is not encouragement — it’s pressure,” she wrote. “It might feel like guilt or failure, and even trigger depression. If a person says they can, then they probably can. If they say they can’t, that’s also valid.”
Njoku concluded by advising that, in some situations, the most supportive response is simply being there and listening rather than offering advice that wasn’t asked for.
