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Why Am I Still Single?

Why Am I Still Single?

It is not uncommon to find people either male or female asking this question. Although, there are some myriads of reasons why some people choose to be single, among which are; the choice to remain single, not being interested in being in a serious and committed relationship usually because of the circumstances beclouding one’s life, a crippling and an abnormal phobia for relationships that stem from the fear of heartbreak and other stressors associated with relationships and the lack of one that is compatible. However, besides these, if one is ready for a relationship and yet it seems no one is coming your way then one may need to answer these pertinent questions :


 Are you available,  yes you want to marry but are you available?.  If you’re carrying emotional baggage, daddy issues, pains, and hurts from the past, then you’re not available. You have to process your healing before thinking of dealing again. We have to understand that as humans our thoughts, attitudes, and ideas send energy out there to be read by people,  if your mindset is wrong it would send out energy that would either make people take advantage of you or ignore you because they think you’re a minus. If you’re dating a married man or dating, someone, you have no business dating you’re also not available because you would be seen as taken already. 


 Do you have unrealistic expectations?. The truth is the kind of guy or girl some people are looking for doesn’t exist.  One would be looking for qualities found in 50 different men or women in one man or woman which is a window dressing and living in a fool’s paradise. Some ladies do say they need a tall, dark, kind, rich, God-fearing gentleman, and if perhaps this kind of guy exists the question is would he like you and find you attractive.  In the same way, you’re stamping different criteria so also is the guy stamping his too. The question is, are you the kind of girl or guy that the guy or girl you’re dreaming about and wanting to marry is dreaming about too? If your standards are too many, chances are you’ll remain single for a long time because no one  usually comes as a finished product but as raw materials to be developed


can people find you?  Do you mingle, do you have places you hang out where people can see you?. Some single ladies are on social media and their page is private barring people from viewing their status and meeting them.  You’re supposed to be single and searching but you’re now single and hiding. Open your page, post your pictures, and let people see you and know the things you’re interested in. If you’re a hair stylist you can’t only be posting pictures about hair, but post about other areas of your interest and by so doing you’re already communicating because your profile contains details that embassies, companies, employers, and even prospective suitors check out to know you.


 A lot of people think they’re smiling while they’re frowning. If you have a serious face, take a mirror and practice the art of smiling, don’t just assume that, that’s how your face is. At Times you might be smiling on the inside but it’s not reflecting on your face outside. Also, learn to relax and walk slowly when you’re walking with someone. Oftentimes, guys may want to approach you but you just walk too fast and always appear to be in a haste. 


You need the capacity to run a relationship because it would cost you time, energy, and money. Love would need servicing.


 Are you the kind of person that falls in love with every girl or guy you see? can you control your emotions can you handle temptations and can you commit to one partner? 


 The holy book says” He that must have friends must show himself friendly “. Are you relatable, are you friendly, are you likable, do you talk to people, and do you smile?.  Psychologists discover that smiling greatly helps in increasing your chance of getting anything you go for. Some people are just so serious-minded, that they can’t even take a joke or play with others and by so doing they’re already pushing people off. Maybe you’re a great person on the inside but let people see it on the outside.

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