Nigerian actor Williams Uchemba has recently shared his thoughts about modern relationships by highlighting the attitude that makes most women remain single. In his most recent post on his official Facebook page, Uchemba addressed the topic of the entitlement some women have by demanding things that they cannot afford from men.
His message is clear: women should not request what they themselves cannot provide. According to him, this attitude of entitlement is the reason some Nigerian women are still single. The issue is not the scarcity of available men but rather the mentality of women who expect flowers, chocolates, and other gifts and do not think how they can also contribute in a relationship especially in this economy.
“There is a law that says anything you cannot afford, do not request it in a restaurant,” Uchemba stated, urging women to be realistic. He pointed out that demanding a man to buy things such as G-Wagon or the newest iPhone model when one cannot even afford to buy such things for oneself is seen as greed.
Another point which Uchemba made was the distinction between appeal and a request. He further said that a woman should know how to influence her man when she wants him to do something instead of demanding. He opines that this is a healthier dynamic for the relationship and is a sign of respect and understanding.
The actor also went on to say that many women think that the physical attractiveness or some temporary features will make a man stay with them but it’s the character that would do this in the long run.
Backing Williams Uchemba’s statement, we should bear in mind that most relationships are built on respect and reciprocity. When one partner constantly demands things they cannot afford themselves, it can create an imbalance, leading to resentment and dissatisfaction. This selfish attitude can prevent the growth of a healthy relationship because then the basis of the relationship is not the values and the characters of the two individuals involved but the material things they are willing and able to provide for each other.
Many Nigerian relationships portray a cultural belief that the man should provide for the family, a culture that is still instilled in most relationships. But with the change of the economy and the general increase of the price level, this expectation becomes a pressure, causing distortions in relationships. For instance, in such cities as Lagos or Abuja, the cost of living is rather high; hence, many men cannot afford to provide their partners with the necessary amounts of money to buy expensive hairs, jewelry, clothes, or other gifts and pay for restaurants and other entertainment facilities as a “certain norm” dictates. This has contributed to mounting irritation and, at times, severities of relationship.
Considering the term ‘Gen Z’ that seems to be trending in Nigerian popular culture, where everybody wants to be like one influencer or the other or wants to live a fake life to belong. Every woman wants to date a Big Boy and travel round and live extravagantly at the expense of somebody else. This simply shows the entitlement mentality which Uchemba speaks against, in place of which the intention should be on nurturing a relationship that would positively benefit both parties involved, instead of putting all effort into what one can get out of the other party.
